my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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