how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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