420 ftw
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
