I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize