Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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