He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
