I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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