Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
