rhymes with "ouble enetration"
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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