What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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