Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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