im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize