A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize