whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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