I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Mom said you looked used
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Randomize
