Buhtt sex?
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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