im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Randomize
