smell my finger.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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