I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
