somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize