i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize