Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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