He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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