I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
