I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize