redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
