Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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