he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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