so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
