quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
