Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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