I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize