is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
