I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
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