Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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