I'm going to rape someone's good day.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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