he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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