I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Enjoy the penises
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
