big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
where does the pee come out of this thing
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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