I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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