In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
