I will die if light touches me.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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