M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize