Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
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