My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
