What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
