i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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