Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
