I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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