The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize
