I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize