Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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