Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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